A Mother's Day Dance with Grief

Ah, Mother’s Day…I have a love/hate relationship with this day now.

This will be my 5th Mother’s Day without the person who made me a mother being here earthside.

And this year it stings.

I don’t know why, but I’m holding loose all of the expectations I had in my head about year 5 without him.

Maybe this year is a hard Mother’s Day for you or someone you know as well. Maybe you are navigating a loss you could never have imagined.

I’m sorry.

I wish I could tell you it will go away. It won’t.

I wish I could tell you it will be less painful soon. There is no timeline.

What I can tell you is that you will arrive on a day, someday, and it won’t knock the breath out of your lungs. You will smile. You will laugh. You will remember with joy and not with immediate tears.

And then you will repeat the process.

There are things those around you will not ever understand. Thank goodness.

If you are watching someone walk through the loss of a child, maybe even decades out from losing a child, please know that even our best days will be harder than you can ever imagine.

Loss is hard. Grief is a rude dance partner who shows up unannounced, stays far too long, and then disappears leaving you to wonder when it will make another appearance…and it will.

Today, give yourself grace.

Today, give yourself permission to go out or stay in. To cry or to laugh.